Mac's: Write 7 non-important things/habit/quirks about yourself.
1. I spend enough on books that the postman thinks that all of the packages sent by Mr Amazon to the close in which I live (nine houses) are for me.
2. I hate: driving; pop music; soap operas (including The Archers: Burn, Ambridge, Burn!); the Underground; walking through Metroland (they're 1920s houses, not Eden); the Guardian and all its associated lesbian, lentil-weaving, finger-in-the-ear folk singing, post-modern inanity (don't start me on the Independent, which I really dislike); the Great Wen; the West Riding; South Yorkshire; religious practices which ape the Church of Rome's; coffee without caffeine; and reading History backwards. The last is the thing I hate most of all (at least at present).
3. I have met six senior members of the Royal Family; one Prime Minister; six Secretaries of State; four: Chiefs of the Defence Staff, First Sea Lords, Chiefs of the General Staff and Chiefs of the Air Staff; and a lot of foreign dignataries as well; never mind slightly less V VIPs and when people ask what they were like, I nearly always answer "really nice", because they nearly always really are.
4. The older I get, the more I realise how right my father was; and when my sister says that I'm turning into my father, I thank her for the compliment.
5. I haven't been abroad for nearly 18 months since I returned from New Zealand dosed up on Immodium.
6. I don't look as English as I am.
7. I have had a beard for two thirds of my life.
1. What was I doing 10 years ago?
Working lunatic hours and missing episodes of my children growing up, at the country's behest.
2. Five things on my to do list.
Open the mail. Check on new books. Keep all of the different Novenas going. Don't do anything which will put a penny in Rupert Murdoch or Richard Branson's pockets. Pray for a friend who has made a wrong decision.
3. Snacks I enjoy
Anything to do with sausages. Tortilla de patatas. Cold veal in breadcrumbs. Pies. Anything included in Ratty's idea of a picnic.
4. Things I would do if I were a billionaire.
I genuinely can't imagine. "Give it all away" sounds a bit pathetic.
5. Three of my bad habits. (only 3?)
I drink too much. I eat too much. I swear too much. (Is it three Hail Marys again, Father?)
6. Five places I have lived.
6. Five jobs I have had.
Orderly on Psychiatric Ward
Ice Cream Van man
Lawn Mower salesman